Rashy
there was a man in the pub
and a woman walks in and sits down
the man says wats red and hairy
the woman says i dont know
and the man replies fannyrash
the woman starts laughing
so the man says do you get it
and the woman says YES |
Survey on "Blow" Jobs
In a recent survey on blow jobs, and why men liked them so much, 6% liked the feeling, 12% liked the excitement and 82% just liked the silence. |
Keep em outta out country!!
a english man, a scottish man, a cornish man and a pakistani man all come across a viel. the viel ses, make a scarafice 2 me or u cant get thru. so da scottish man gives away his bagpipe thingy, and the cornish man givs up a cornish pastie. the english man chucks the pakinstani through the viel and the other men ask, why did u thro him over... |
Pants
Your jeans are so raggady it looks like you slid from first base all the way to home base!!!!!!!! |
Why do firls slap so hard?
WHY do girls slap so hard?
Because there hand is always motivated |
The fly
a fly is hovering above a river, a salmon thinks if that fly drops six inches i will be able to bite it. little does he know there is a bear behind him. it thinks if that fly drops six inches the salmon will bite it and i can eat the salmon. little does he know there is a hunter behind him. he thinks if that fly drops six inches the salmon will bit... |
Nuts
What do you call nuts on the wall. (wallnuts)
What do you call nuts on your chest. (Chestnuts)
What do you call nuts on your chin, (they say chinnuts), you say "no dick in your mouth" |
Jerk
there were three boys named poop jerk and maners they were riding there bikes and poop kept falling of maners kept helping him. a man drove up to jerk and said whats your name jerk jerk said the man said what he said jerk!the man said wheres your maners.jerk said in the backyard picking up poop |
Magic Miror
There once was a husband and wife who went to a yard sale and looked around. They were about to leave until the wife saw this golden mirror! They went to the man who owned it and asked "how much". The man replied it is cursed! But I will give it to you for $12". They took the mirror home and placed it in there room. Later the wife went to the mirro... |
Shit happens....
Why did god give women thrush.... He wanted them to know what it was like to live with an irritating cunt. |
Limbless Ben
Ben and Bill are lumberjacks. One fateful day, Ben accidently chopped off his arm. So Bill put the arm in a plastic bag. He took it to the hospital and says that it will take 6 hours to repair it. So Bill left for six hours and came back. The doctor said he finished up early and that Ben is at the bar. So Bill went to the bar and found Ben throwing... |
Abbo
how long does it take for an abbo to shit
9 months |
Nigga
what do you do if you see a nigger running around with half a head?????
stop laughing and reload |
Pick up lines
if i flip this coin is there any chance of me getting head tonight? |
Funnyjokes
you so ugly you had to tie a pork-chop around your neck to get a dog to play with you |
Cunt
in a swer two tampons are raceing two peroid pads one says too the other there suck up the cunt ha ha |
You Should Be Me.
You so ugly Freddy Couger Said, take my place. |
Smiling...
Smile!...Its The Second Best Thing A Person Can Do With Their Mouth! |
Suspect #1
The police is looking for a suspect who is tall, skinny,, handsome, adorable, and smart. now dont worry, your ugly ass is safe but where do I hide |
What do you call a man who....
Question = What do you call a logical man who seems to know a lot about the female species?
Answer = A Muffmatician |
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