Aglass of water
I was putting my sons to bed earley one Friday night in preperation for some expected guest .As I was about to turn the lights out ,the youngest said "daddy could I have a glass of water "?I said no because he would wet the bed .So about 15 min later I heard him yell hot for his mother asking the same .Her responce was the samas mine .(no you will... |
The bear and rabbit
the bear and the rabbit live in the same woods and they dont like each other but they bumped into each other and ran into a golden frog so the bear says hey you give us wishes right the frog looks up and says fuck yeah three for you and three for the rabbit so the bear goes fist ,okay i want all the bears in this forest to be female,so then the rab... |
Joes sex
name.joe dorbasher
sex.sertontenly 4 times a day
no i mean male or female
i have sex with females and males sometimes wild animals |
Blonde Girl At A Cola Machine
One day a blonde girl walked into a bar straight up to the cola machine.Placing money
in she pressed the button, a drink came out.She kept doing this placing money in pressing the button out comes a drink.After a while this man walks up to her he said am you ever going to finish with this today she responded no not till i win |
Got Any Grapes
So a duck walks into a bar hops up onto a stool and says, "got any grapes?" and the bartender says, "No we only sell beer and whiskey and stuff like that." so the duck leaves. The next day the duck walks into the bar and says, "Got any grapes?" and the bartender said, "I already told you NO now get out of here if you come back and ask me that quest... |
Whitey
Your mom is so nasty she gets less action than a white player in the NBA. |
Vegitarean
Did use hear about the vegi that died ?
There was a big Turnip !! |
Carry your burdens and sorrow
A man came from church one day and upon reaching da house he met his wife at da hall.As soon as he saw his wife he carried her up not wanting to drop her.Da wife was surprised and asked her husband whether da pastor preached about being romantic to your partners.Da man said no and then da wife was a little bit suprised and stil wanted to know why ... |
Woman in Bar
Theres a guy sitting in a bar. A women comes up and raises her hand for a drink. The women has really hairy armpits. The guy tells the bartender," Get the ballerina a drink." The bartender gets out, fills a drink, and gives it to the woman. After she finishes her drink she raises her arm again. The guy says," Get this ballerina a drink." The barten... |
Woman in Bar
Theres a guy sitting in a bar. A women comes up and raises her hand for a drink. The women has really hairy armpits. The guy tells the bartender," Get the ballerina a drink." The bartender gets out, fills a drink, and gives it to the woman. After she finishes her drink she raises her arm again. The guy says," Get this ballerina a drink." The barten... |
Ugly
You are so ugly your mother had birth controle after you were born. |
A dumb robot
Q:What do you call a robot that always takes the long way?
A:R-2 Detour |
YOUR MOM
-Your mom is a pony everybody wants a ride -Your mom is a doorknob everyone wants a turn |
Blonde parties
Q. What do you call a room full of blondes with PMS and yeast infection?
A. A wine and cheese party. |
Legs of a blonde
Q. What did the blondes left leg say to her right leg?
A. Nothing they have never met. |
Thats just not right
man:doctor!doctor!I have a raddish growing out of my left ear!
doctor:well thats just not right.
man:yes docter I know! I planted eggplant in my right ear! |
Joke
Boy:Mum the boys at school calling me a girl
Mum:well hit them with your handbag! |
Shopping
what did tesco say to the naughty plastic bag ? packaging |
Blondes and eggs
Q.how do blondes like there eggs in the morning
A.fertilized |
Michael jackson
Q.why did michael jackson place a call to boyz-2-men
A.he thought it was a delivery service |
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